concoursec | You don't have the guts to take the truth or consequence

Entry tags:

You don't have the guts to take the truth or consequence

Character(s): Nepeta Leijon (

bestmoirail) & various.

Location: Staggered throughout different days and different places.

Rating: R for some possibly sad and triggery issues.

Open/Closed/Finished: Closed

Summary: Nepeta has gained a strange power, and she begins to see parts of people she shouldn't. This is for the super-powers events, details of what is going on can be found here. I'll be setting up individual threads for each person under this one log so as not to spam the community.

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[She no longer hesitated, and her arms slipped easily around Ronnae, pulling her close. She didn't shush her, didn't say anything for a good while. Just held her, and pet her hair a bit while she cried all she needed.]

[It was a subject that fueled her nightmares and prompt her to hurt herself, not that it was something she was ready to talk about considering that it was wrong to harm yourself... But just feeling her friend there... someone who was with her when she needed them... it made it all better for once in her life.

That comforting feeling allowed her to just let herself go without having to succumb to darker thoughts and she almost tired herself out completely as she cried herself sore against her friend.

After a bit, she finally let go, very slowly, and moved back to wipe at her face and sniffle a few times before looking at her friend and blushing, slightly embarrassed.]

I... I t-think I s-soaked your shirt... I... I'm s-sorry Nepeta.

[Of course a little, tiny, playfulness was in order, she had to try and get back her bearings in front of her friend.]

Don't worry about it, Ronnae. It's just a shirt, after all. [she gave Ronnae's shoulder a small squeeze before fully letting go of her.]

Um. I don't think this is really something you should keep inside, you know? I don't think it's purrticularly healthy to bottle that stuff up. So...so if you do want to talk, you don't have to worry about bothering me. And it doesn't even haveta be you talk to just someone, okay?

[Ronnae looked down in thought. Her friend was being so caring and nice, it almost seemed surreal to have someone like her...]

My world's full of races... [she started, as if recalling the things that have happened to her.]

Pure, proud, strong races with incredible bloodlines and history... It wouldn't be surprising that at some point there'd be people who fall for people from the other races and yet... and yet half-breeds are shunned, disliked, even loathed and hated at times...

I'm one of those half-breeds... and... prior to school... I didn't care... I was happy... I loved my mama, my papa and were I came from but... The... t-the nobles made sure I... they made sure I knew my place in the world almost as soon as I started school...

[Nepeta remembered her mentioning her being a half-breed when they first me. It had never even occurred to her that such relationships would be looked down upon, and now t hat she thought more on it she found it even sillier.

At what Ronnae said last, however, she frowned deeply. This was sounding way too much like hemospectrum nonsense.]

Don't say it like that! No one should treat anyone that way! You are right to be proud of who you are, and where you come furrom, Ronnae. You're a great purrson just as you are. People who decide someone's worth on something as dumb as what species they are, or the color of their blood are the ones who need to realize how ridiculous that is. It doesn't change who the purrson is!

[Ronnae smiled at her friend's passion and thoughts on the subject. She really wished she could curb these feelings but... the sheer amount of damage that had been done to her was much greater than anyone ever knew. Regardless of that... she was glad Nepeta was there, cheering her forward... she really needed it at this moment.]

I... I know... It's j-jus' the way things were... I was t-there to please them... and even that... t-that I should see it as a privilege. that' I'm allowed to be in their presence and please their every desire...

[Her stomach twisted a little at that thought. Unsurprisingly, having only turned the equivalent of thirteen years old today, sex was not something Nepeta had had much exposure to. Especially considering she had grown up in the wild away from other trolls and media so out of everything that was the most jarring for her. Seeing the way Ronnae had been treated made it difficult to see why so many people seemed obsessed with it. Quite frankly, if anything she was beginning to view it as disgusting.]

But you do know that's not how is should have been, right? That you are so much more than that?

[Ronnae gave her a small, bittersweet smile and shrugged.]

I don't really care anymore... It gave me a purpose I suppose... Most people who found out, which mind you were very few, always told me it was disgusting an' such... But in the end?

[she hated thinking about it... what was worse? She hated accepting that it made her happy at one point... after they had broken her spirit, after they had destroyed everything that had made her happy at one point... a new feeling had arisen, and that's when she had known, back then, that she had been changed... It was now one of the things that stayed with her... that feeling of being docile and submissive whenever she was outside of combat... and even then, battle was something that changed her life even more and twisted her emotions in a different fashion... but that was neither here nor there...]

In the end it gave me a reason to live... I know... I know it sounds stupid... and w-wrong... [She had to take a moment to wipe her face as she struggled to keep a straight face. It was hard, specially putting herself out there like this. She was leaving herself completely vulnerable and if it wasn't because she had grown to completely trust her friend, she wouldn't have spoken so openly about it.]

But that feeling that I was being coveted, even if it was in such a negative manner... brought a bit of joy to my dark and lonely life.

[Nepeta supposed she could go on and on about how Ronnae shouldn't have felt like that, but she supposed it didn't matter now. The past was the past, and what did matter was making sure that she still didn't feel that way. It's not that she wanted to dismiss those awful things that had happened to her--but Ronnae said it herself. She didn't care anymore. A part of Nepeta was dubious about just how true this was but it's not like they could go back and change this.

Instead she just wanted to make sure it never happened again.]

Not that this purrobably amounts to much of anything, but I'm real sorry that all happened, and I'm real sorry you were so lonely that you came to feel that way towards what they did.

But you don't ever have to feel that way again beclaws you're not alone, and I don't mean just me. I know it can be hard to talk to people sometimes but there are so many people here who are real, real nice, and who I know would love to be your furriends.

You don't need people like that--you can have people who like you fur who you are.

[Ronnae thought this was possibly the spot where she should cut the information trail, after all it was a heavy subject for anyone, even herself and she'd hate herself if she distanced her only friend by bringing up things that she fought so hard to hide. She didn't think she could handle being here if it wasn't for Nepeta...

She looked down embarrassed and smiled bittersweetly,]

Thanks... for everything... for listening and being here for me... You... y-you're really sweet and important to me so... d-don't hesitate to ask for anything kay?

[She was thanking her for much more than that. The words that she spoke made her feel better for now, but she feared that pressing her luck would be detrimental for her right now. She had been here for a while now and the only person she'd grown close to was her roommate. Sure there had been people she had briefly spoken to and had a bit of fun but nothing that anyone would tell her was solid.]

Of course, Ronnae. It's the same fur me, you know. You really helped me out a lot when I furst got here and I want to be able to do the same fur you.

[Ronnae smiled, leaning forward to hug Nepeta close, happy to have someone like her here.]

Thanks so much~ [She said before leaning back and smiling at her.]

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